What GM's do in thier spare time vol. 1Follow

Vol. 4
Subtitled "Taru Card Game GM style"

*Bob is on the chair, leg up on table*
*<notsorandomtarutaru> still on the ground. 3 days have passed*
*Joe enters*
Joe: Just finished suspending yet another harraser.
*Bob ignores him*
Joe: ....?
Bob: yo man look at what I found.
Joe: ?
*Bob shows him a Tarut Card: The King*
Joe: Oh its that thing.
Bob: you know what it is?
Joe: Of course.
Bob: Lol for the love of god, tell me I have no idea. None of the other guys know either.
Joe: Well the official term is "Some random object that is always sold for 9,999,999 gil at people's bazaar".
Bob: ah. why the *** do they do that anyway?
Joe: Hell do I know.
Bob: Yo lets go and buy some.
Joe: And abandon post?
<notsorandomtarutaru> OH C"MON!!!! RAISE ME ALREADY!!!
Joe: Sure.
<notsorandomtarutaru> Dont you dare do what you did last time!
Joe: Okay.
Joe steps on <notsorandomtarutaru>'s body.
Joe: okay lets go.
Bob: move move move!
Joe: Sector clear!
Bob: Enemy down!
Joe: Team go!
*Bob and Joe exit scene*

*Our hero's enter Kazhm*
<randomplayer1049> pst pst! its two GMs!
<randomplayer1049'sfriend> wonder what they do here!
<noob124> i dunno! but lets start talking in l337 speak!
<noob124'sfriend> 7ea8 dwag! ( attempt at l337 speak)
Joe starts casting noob-aga.
Joe casts noob-aga.
Bob: Thank god.
Bob: okay lets move on. To the jungle!
*Bob and Joe enter Yuhtunga Jungle*
<noob156> /sh GOB TO ZONE!!
<noob532> /sh GOB TO ZONE!!
<noob1123> /sh GOB TO ZONE!!
<noob11> /sh GOB TO ZONE!!
<noob1> /sh GOB TO ZONE!!
<noob11234> /sh GOB TO ZONE!!
<noob999> /sh GOB TO ZONE!!
<noob169> /sh GOB TO ZONE!!
*8 noobs simultaneously hit the zone line*
*Gob hits zone*
*Gob hits zone*
*Gob hits zone*
*Gob hits zone*
*Gob hits zone*
*Gob hits zone*
*Gob hits zone*
*Gob hits zone*
Bob: lag!
Joe casts Bahamut.
Bahamut: WTF? I was sleeping!
Joe: Oh c'mon man, take out this Gobs.
Bahamut: *** no! I'm going back to sleep!
Bahamut unsummons himself
Gob hits Joe for 0 damage.
Gob hits Joe for 0 damage.
Gob hits Joe for 0 damage.
Gob hits Joe for 0 damage.
Gob hits Joe for 0 damage.
Gob hits Joe for 0 damage.
Gob hits Joe for 0 damage.
Gob hits Joe for 0 damage.
Joe: Oh man. I hate that guy, so lazy.
Bob readies Spinning Blade
Gob takes 9,999 points of damage.
Gob takes 9,999 points of damage.
Gob takes 9,999 points of damage.
Gob takes 9,999 points of damage.
Gob takes 9,999 points of damage.
Gob takes 9,999 points of damage.
Gob takes 9,999 points of damage.
Gob takes 9,999 points of damage.
Gob takes 9,999 points of damage.

Bob: okay now to find some bazaars with cards.
Joe: Oh look heres one!
Joe examines <randomplayer56>
Joe starts browing <randomplayer56>'s bazaar.
<randomplayer56> hOlY! 'tiS a gM c8ting mah bazAAr!
<noob56formallyknownasrandomplaer56> buY mah cARdS!
Joe: Give it to me, or I will kill you.
<noob56>: ...
Bob readies Spinning Blade
<noob56>: Okay okay! I h8 you gM's!
<noob56> wishes to trade with Bob.
<noob56> trades Bob Tarut Card: Death
<noob56> trades Bob Tarut Card: The Fool
<noob56> trades Bob Tarut Card: The Hermit
<noob56> trades Bob Tarut Card: THe King
Bob trades <noob56> a Goblin Bomb
<noob56> WtF!
Bob: okay lets go
Joe: move move move!
<noob56> ...
Bob: gogogo!
BOOM!
Joe: Enemy down!
Bob: Sector Clear.
*Terrorists Win!*
<randomplayerinyuhtungajungle1> ?
*Bob and Joe exit scene*

*Back in Jail Cell*

Joe: Okay, ready?
Bob: yeah!
Joe: Okay first we need 4 players.
Bob: But we only got 2 here, and the other guys are sleeping
<notsorandomanymoretarutaru> I"M RIGHT HERE!!!
Bob: Oh right. Well ur 3 days suspension is over.
<notsorandomanymoretarutaru> ITS BEEN 8 DAYS!
Bob: Oh shuttup.
Joe starts casting Raise XVWI on <notsorandomanymoretarutaru>
<notsorandomanymoretarutaru> you know i have a name.
Bob: what is it?
<notsorandomanymoretarutaru> Kmartaru
Bob: ..ok.
Joe: Still need one more.
Kmartaru: What we going taru do?
Bob starts casting Shiva
Shiva: Sup guys.
/t Joe Nice choice...
*Bob stares at Shiva*
*Joe stares at Shiva*
*Kmartaru stares at the wall*
Shiva: Stop staring!
Shiva: What did you summon me for?
Bob: To find out what these cards do.
Shiva: They do nothing.
Joe: No, its for a card game called "Top-secret Tarut Card Game that only Tarus know how to play"
Bob: You know how to play it Kmartaru?
Kmartaru: No.
Joe: ...ok, then its just "op-Secret Card Game That Only I Know How To Play".
Shiva: Say it already.
Joe: Okay, listen up. I'm about to tell you the most top-secret car-
Kmartaru starts undercutting prices to defeat local shops.
Joe: wtf?
Karmtaru: Sorry i just couldn't resist.
Joe: okay anyway, the rules are simple. Everyone gets randomly dealt a Tarut Card, and also 5 other normal playing cards.
The point of the game is to put down all 5 of your normal cards before the other people do. We take turns, one by one, to put down cards.
Bob: Thats it?
Shiva: Then whoever goes first wins.
Joe: The trick is the Tarut Card, that you have. Each tarut card has a different "special ability".
Joe: But its kinda random, so you never know who wins.

*Tarut Card Game that no one knows how to play BEGINS!*

Joe is dealt Tarut Card: Death
Bob is dealt Tarut Card: The Hermit
Shiva is dealt Tarut Card: The King
Kmartaru is dealt Taru Card: The Fool

*Let the games begin!*

Joe puts down 1st card.
Bob puts down 1st card.
Shiva puts down 1st card.
Kmartaru puts down 3rd card.
Joe: Wat the hell? You put down your first card.
Kmartaru: oh.
Kmrataru puts down 1st card.

Joe puts down 2nd card.
Bob puts down 2nd card.
Shiva puts down 2nd card.
Kmartaru scrathes his head.
Joe: Your supposed to put down a card.
Kmartaru: ?
Kmartaru scratches his head in confusion.


Joe puts down 3rd card.
Bob puts down 3rd card.
Shiva puts down 3rd card.
Kmartaru scrathes his head.
Shiva: This game is boring.

Shiva activates Tarut Card: The King
Shiva is allowed turned into King Opo-opo.
Shiva: ?
Shiva is given a bannana
Shiva: OOH!
Shiva eats the bannana!
Shiva obtains POWER-UP! She is allowed to put down 2 or more cards.
Shiva: WooT! I win!
*Shiva scrathes his head with bannana in her mouth*

Joe: Not so fast!
Joe activates Tarut Card: Death
Joe is allowed to eliminate one opponent.
Joe eliminates Shiva.
Shiva: not fair!

Bob activates Tarut Card: The Hermit
Bob: What the hel is a hermit anyway?
Kmartaru: Methinks itaru is a crab.
Bob is turned into a hermit crab!
Bob is now allowed to snip at the air uselessly!
*Bob snips at the air uselessly*
Bob: ....

Joe: Down to the last round! First to put down another card wins!

Kmartaru activates Tarut Card: The Fool
Joe begins to scratch his balls.
Kmartaru is allowed to say a joke of his choice. Time paused.
Kmartaru: Hmm...
Joe: Go already! I'm stuck in this position!
*Joe looks around in embarrasment*
Kmartaru: I GOT ONE!
Kmartaru: SO funny!
Kmartaru: What kind of music did the Pilgrims listen to?
Joe: umm...
Bob: *snip* *snip*
Kmartaru: Plymouth Rock!
*Joe is stunned from the lameness for 5 turns*
*Bob is stunned from the lameness for 5 turns*
Kmartaru: wOOt!
Kmartaru: now what do I do?
* 1 Turn passes *
Kmartaru puts down 2nd card.
Kmartaru puts down 3rd card.
Kmartaru puts down 4th card.
Kmartaru puts down 5th card.

Joe: .....
Bob: .....
King Opo-opo: .....









KMARTARU WINS!!!!

Joe: Godamn.
Bob: That was gay.
*King Opo-Opo turns back into Shiva*
Shiva: ....

Kmartaru: yeah!

Joe: bob..pstpst..whisper...
Bob: uhhuh...yea...pstpst...whisper..
Kmartaru: uhhuh...yeah..pstpst...whisper...
Joe: Stop pretending ur in the conversation!
Kmartaru: Oh sorry. So what do I get for winning?

Bob and Joe uppercuts Kmartaru into the sky!
*Kmartaru's body glimmers like a star as it fades away*
(those of you that have watched anime know wat i mean)

Shiva: lol

Thus ends Vol. 4

heh...that was great...my favorite line, for no particual reason...was


<notsorandomtarutaru> Can you raise me?


Oh, that and Tarandor's signature

(Who's cruel idea was it for the word "Lisp" to have an "S" in it?)

That...cracks me up everytime I see it...

Edit: Damn, that "Can you raise me" doesn't look funny without the you

So, at the end of part three, when the Taru looks at the opo-opo GM and says

"Can you raise me?"

Edited, Wed Jun 9 09:08:36 2004 by Kipsy

Kmartaru starts undercutting prices to defeat local shops.
Joe: wtf?
Karmtaru: Sorry i just couldn't resist.


lol people came from the other room at work cuz i started laughing. nice creativity lol.

LOL Classic!!!

Wow that is funny

Lol thanks for the encouragement. Volume 5 coming!

LOL!

awsome!
favorite lline
Kmartaru starts undercutting prices to defeat local shops.
Joe: wtf?
Karmtaru: Sorry i just couldn't resist.

ROTFLMFAO!!

Ok, I'm now certain that these are funny... I can't stop laughing after the last one. ^^

Awh man, some of the stupidist things in there, lol, but a lot of it makes me crack up...lol love the provoke thing.

First time that I have seen this and I love it ^__^