She's freely admitted that her biggest problem with them is that she isn't any good. She loves Mario Kart, and played the crap out of Mario 64 in college. But she hasn't been able to find any games that are casual yet challenging, and allow her to just play for a little bit and still feel accomplished.
I heard the same thing when I got my wife into FFXI. Her thing was that she didn't know anything about the game, how to play, what to do, etc so she was just scared. Then when she seen that grouping was part of the game, she was even worse. She was afraid that if she screwed up, people would talk crap. She was also afraid of messing up and letting people down.
She figured out her job and she read a ton of wiki, she became comfortable. To the point that healing alliance in sky events she would ***** back at people when they would complain about something, like asking for r3's during kirin fights. LOL after only a couple months she went from a kitten to a lion when it came to doing her job. She would tear into people about not bringing oils powders, exp buffers, etc.
It's just a comfort thing with your GF too, I bet. You just need to make sure to stay with her and help her figure things out.
So what I'm hoping is FFXIV might be that game for her. There's nothing I want more (ok, I'm sure there's actually quite a few things I want more...) than for us to be able to play a game like this together. From all the tidbits I've read (and I think I've read about every tidbit that's been released), it sounds like they're trying to go in a direction that might allow this.
There really hasn't been a whole a lot of confirmed info released yet. We have basically been given a glimpse of package cover and back, but the manual is still hidden inside.
The hints, rumors, and speculation has been pointing to a mixed casual and hardcore friendly game, but we won't know for sure until later.
Maybe she'd like to become a crafter or a harvester, and those are viable option in this game (*fingers crossed*). It would be awesome to have a partnership with her, I go out and kill stuff, she crafts, we game in harmony :)
Again we don't know for sure what the game holds. On the website, it almost appears that a crafter is a class of it's own. But everything is pretty vague right now, so only time will tell how crafting will truly work in the game.
To be safe, you might better fantasize about duoing with her through content. Picking complimenting classes and take on the world together as partners.
All I'm saying is, that would be great, because I know I'm gonna get sucked into Eorzea and it'd be nice to share that.
This might be where the wrench gets tossed into the gears. If you get "sucked in" and play a more serious/hardcore/fast paced style and she decides she just wants to take her time, you might have some problems.
A couple joined my guild in lotro not long ago. He was into going all out and leveling up, she decided she wanted to play an hour here or an hour there. After he hit level 30 and she was still at 15, she felt left behind. She got ****** and quit the game. He did get her to come back a week later, but they both started over and he slowed down to her speed. Now she is happy and he is happy to be playing with her. He said it was more fun the 2nd time around with her beside him.
Depending on her style of playing you might have to adjust if you want to keep her happy and interested in the game. Don't leave her behind. If you get lucky, maybe she will be the same style as you after she gets the hang of the game.
Otherwise you might want to consider having two characters for yourself (if possible depending how SE handles multiple characters). You use one character for nothing but GF play time and the other for your balls to the wall play time. Just remember, when she logs on, you switch to the GF playtime character--no skipping out cause you have a raid or what ever comes up. GF time will always be first if you want to keep her happy and playing with you. Unless you have an very understanding GF that don't mind you running off with the boys when she wants to spend time with you.