Hmm. Your post seems to have more to do with the state of forums in general and not much to do with what you quoted from me. I'm also not sure I agree with your definition of hate. You definitely touched on some things I've also noticed about forums, but I think you're conflating too many things into one.
You'd be right, on both parts. It would be great to say that it's just this forum or that issue. But the truth of the matter, over the last several years, forums have gotten worse and worse in terms of overall maturity and ability to remain civil. Blanket statement? Most defiantly, but the fault lies heavily in lax moderation more than people refusing to be civil. A few highly attentive moderators and boards tend to straighten up quickly.
The problem is, Boards are more fragile than the games they gather around, so between fear of not getting enough subscribers or add clicks, and just the sheer load of having someone attentive to large yield sites like this one, you end up with some pretty unappealing community gatherings.
Perhaps you should consider only letting the game influence your experience of the game. Sure, other people inside the actual game changing the environment (shouting obscenities, insulting each other and/or their gear, etc.) might have an influence, but the forums? You don't have to read those. You also don't have to let yourself get caught up in the word wars that people have.
This is indeed a good point, but it comes with complications.
The difficulty here lies in the purpose for a community. Strictly speaking, forums is the place you go for gatherings, questions and quick info when Wiki's fail to provide the detail or personalization you desire.
Finding a that guide or speculation you desire may not exist in the usual places. So you stand to loose a lot by avoiding the forums JUST to avoid the crap.
There's also the backwash effect. What happens in these communities floods the game, melded opinions and mentalities form here, and it's good to be aware of the trends and mechanics created when you form your own personal choices. The problem is, however, is that they don't need to be so negatively reinforced, yet they are to the point of excess. When someone makes a personal and informed choice to spec a certain way, the conversation should shift to how to make the most of that spec or how to improve upon that route, not how horrible/stupid/ignorant that person is for making the choice. That's trolling and flaming, two things that clearly break the rules, yet are not moderated enough to be discouraged.
It is merely an unfortunate side effect of people offering opinions that some people will take offense. However, I see little reason to avoid expressing my complaints about something that I find damaging to myself (I really want to enjoy FFXIV, but the various problems I've talked about prevent it; my expectations were not met, and my hopes have, so far, been dashed) simply because you want to look at things in a more rosy frame of mind.
Then (and I stress this isn't you personally, but a generally call-out) present your arguments like a mature adult, and not like an ignorant political protest. "A game that doesn't play the way I like it, therefore I'm going to blow my horn as hard as I can to push people away so the game fails, and then MAYBE they'll listen to me." Is not constructive criticism, nor does it really work. (Aion is a perfect example of this.) If you continually dissuade away from the game in its infancy , it does NOT recover from it. It will balance out with the hardest of devoted players and the company will appeal primarily to them. If the game starts with an initial success, then declines due to specific, identifiable flaws, THEN it will attempt to recover, as you've given them a taste of what they're capable of.
"Rosy Frame of Mind" is exactly what you want to start an MMO on if you want it to successfully develop. Demanding instant satisfaction, and turning astutely against the company when you get it hurts both sides.
A couched insult is still an insult. If you want to start a change in the way forums work, you can't engage in the very behavior you are protesting. It may sound more noble the way you said it, but it remains what it is, with a little bit of hypocrisy added on.
When someone openly declares a complete dismissal of you, it becomes difficult not to become offended. In my opinion, he received what he gave as politely as I could for how rudely I was being regarded.
His attitude implied that I had not taken more than my fare share of debates and arguments that require "a thick skin". That couldn't be farther from the truth. However I am reaching a certain saturation point with the growing intensity of flaming and trolling on Zam specifically, and it deserves better than this. I'm not expecting flowery kindness from the boards, but people should know when to bite their tongs (or their fingers in this case.)
And when they can't the mods need to be there to step in; IMO more frequently than they have been. ZAM had a really good running when the quality of the boards were fairly good. Now it seems to have fallen a bit and a lot more is being let slide.
I don't deny that some people do like the game. You say crap-colored glasses, I say undying FF fanboyism. Somewhere in the middle is an objective review of the game, and I'd bet good money that it won't be too great.
The game really does have potential in it. The little bit of storyline I got from the Gridania intro I enjoyed watching. I love the Lalafell from the first CS. But when it actually comes time to get into the gameplay, I am disappointed at how far behind SE is for a launch in 13 days. I'd love to see SE get aggressive at fixing the UI and gameplay bugs and keep better contact with the player base (especially the non-JP audience). If they did that I'd probably buy the game at launch day.
Here's an example of a contrasting opinion that I respect. You're balancing the pros and cons of both opinions, and the things that are disappointing you. Outright utter discouragement is wrong
in the form of methodology, not in opinion. Maintaining that the game has critical flaws, while still hoping for potential isn't in and of itself a bad thing, but when the presentation (or countering) of it becomes a matter of one person trolling another, or back and forth arguing that for the most part, becomes pointless, then that's a serious problem that harms the community as a whole.
It's not just in this game, I acknowledge (and agree with) some of the arguments they're trying to make, even though I staunchly disagree with their methodology to try to 'force' a solution.
To reiterate. There's nothing wrong with being disappointed with the game, nor is there in defending the strong points of the game and remaining hopeful for it's future. However, when you get to the point where your are actively (and venomantly) discouraging players from playing the game and finding out for themselves, you are contributing to further problems. Giving a player a taste of the game as flawed as it is will give them a more accurate assessment of the game than any opinion. It should be up to them to decide if the box sale was worth it. If they're hanging on the edge, that's what the open beta is for. If they're having difficulties, and you wish to prove or emphasize your point, then share your key or point it out constructively. They may decide the game is worth grunting through the issues, and that's fine, leave it at that.
Calling people "Fanboi" for supporting a game in spite of it's flaws is just derogatory and pointless. There is nothing wrong in being a fan, after all, if everyone stops supporting the game, it'll just crash and burn. It's on the backs of the devout fans you'll have your chance for the game to improve.
And improve it will, if FFXI is any indication, SE does listen, even if they're a bit slow to respond and do not always react the way we desire. The advantage of MMOs is that they do develop, unlike a lot of retail games that will usually not be updated. However, even then, there may be a good game behind the flaws if they can be overlooked. (The Last Remnant has horrible issues, but that does not prevent it from sitting in my collection after being thoroughly enjoyed.)
It's all a matter of what you can tolerate from the onset. And it should be stressed that people on both sides of the argument really do need to respect the opinions and discuss the issues rather than beat each other with them.