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FFXIV: Corrupt-A-WishFollow

#1 Feb 01 2011 at 7:34 PM Rating: Decent
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Corrupt-a-wish!

The rules are simple:

I make a wish regarding FFXIV, and the next person to post finds an ironic way to derive bad consequences from granting the wish, or to otherwise tag a downside to it, and so on and so forth.
For example:
"I wish there were more classes in this game."
"Granted, but they're all Disciple of Land."



Mine!

I wish Ancient Magic did awesome damage relative to its MP Cost.
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#2 Feb 01 2011 at 7:37 PM Rating: Default
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but they are still going to look like the **** they do now.
#3 Feb 01 2011 at 7:38 PM Rating: Good
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Granted, but this post is the same as every post on Zam (But you posted a rule making people troll).
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#4 Feb 01 2011 at 8:41 PM Rating: Default
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levelxplane wrote:
Corrupt-a-wish!

The rules are simple:

I make a wish regarding FFXIV, and the next person to post finds an ironic way to derive bad consequences from granting the wish, or to otherwise tag a downside to it, and so on and so forth.
For example:
"I wish there were more classes in this game."
"Granted, but they're all Disciple of Land."



Mine!

I wish Ancient Magic did awesome damage relative to its MP Cost.



Granted! But it takes so long to cast that melees double you in damage without wasting time or mp.

I wish they'd implement pet jobs.
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#5Ostia, Posted: Feb 01 2011 at 9:07 PM, Rating: Sub-Default, (Expand Post) Granted! But your pet is not controllable and only grants debuff 50yrds in radious while costing you 5% mana every second your pet is out
#6 Feb 01 2011 at 9:23 PM Rating: Excellent
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Granted: Wear a clown costume while you play.
I wish the wards wouldn't crash
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#7 Feb 01 2011 at 9:55 PM Rating: Excellent
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flavvor wrote:
I wish the wards wouldn't crash.


Granted. Due to server instability, the market wards have been permanently removed. To compensate, SE will add pre-programmable "/say" and "/shout" commands to advertise your wares. Up to five commands can run at a time per character, and each will automatically repeat every 30 seconds.

I wish SE would add Blue Mage in tomorrow's update.

Edited, Feb 1st 2011 7:57pm by akirussan
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#8 Feb 01 2011 at 10:51 PM Rating: Decent
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Granted! Now monsters dont use special ability's thus making blue mages useless XD!

I wish they added dungeons to the game
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#9 Feb 01 2011 at 10:52 PM Rating: Good
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Granted, but Blue mage will now be Called Bacon Mage all you can do is throw bacon.

I wish: the game would have more content. Quest, Campain, ect...

Granted, But every time you enter a dungen its dark and you cannot see anything.

Edited, Feb 1st 2011 11:53pm by flavvor
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#10 Feb 01 2011 at 11:42 PM Rating: Excellent
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flavvor wrote:
I wish: the game would have more content. Quest, Campain, ect...


Granted, but you are limited to a total combination of 8 quests -OR- guildleves per day. Campaign has also been added, but instead of fighting alongside NPCs, you fight alongside retainers. Dead retainers lose all goods they hold. Forever.

I wish that there was a web interface to view, post, and sell items on the marketplace via a website.
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#11 Feb 01 2011 at 11:46 PM Rating: Excellent
Mikhalia the Picky wrote:

Granted, but you are limited to a total combination of 8 quests -OR- guildleves per day. Campaign has also been added, but instead of fighting alongside NPCs, you fight alongside retainers. Dead retainers lose all goods they hold. Forever.

I wish that there was a web interface to view, post, and sell items on the marketplace via a website.


Granted, but everything except for Moko Grass and Marmot Pelts is BoA.

I wish that we got in game mail.
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#12 Feb 01 2011 at 11:50 PM Rating: Excellent
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Granted, but you have to list all your items on a single web page which is buried along with several dozen other web pages in a broad category. Also, the website gets a 404 error every 8 hours, and you have to relist your items.

Edit: beat me to it.

Granted, but there will be mail wards and you have to deliver your mail to the recipient's mail retainer.


I wish I could skill chain and shoot an arrow like that dude in the opening movie.


Edited, Feb 2nd 2011 12:53am by Jamaz
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#13 Feb 01 2011 at 11:52 PM Rating: Excellent
Jamaz wrote:
Granted, but you have to list all your items on a single web page which is buried along with several dozen other web pages in a broad category. Also, the website gets a 404 error every 8 hours, and you have to relist your items.

I wish I could skill chain and shoot an arrow like that dude in the opening movie.


You can, use Red Lotus Blade on Archer...i mean...uh...granted, but it does 0 damage.

I still want in game mail.
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#14 Feb 02 2011 at 1:07 AM Rating: Good
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Yabusame the Wise wrote:
Jamaz wrote:
Granted, but you have to list all your items on a single web page which is buried along with several dozen other web pages in a broad category. Also, the website gets a 404 error every 8 hours, and you have to relist your items.

I wish I could skill chain and shoot an arrow like that dude in the opening movie.


You can, use Red Lotus Blade on Archer...i mean...uh...granted, but it does 0 damage.

I still want in game mail.

Granted, but it's snail mail and delivery takes between 1 and 6 hours for anything other than plain text mail.

I wish they added Ishgard and Chocobos
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#15 Feb 02 2011 at 1:51 AM Rating: Good
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Granted: however there will be a gate outside ishgard so you can not enter. Wish granted again! But the chocobos will only run as fast as Hermes' shoes.


I wish they would make parties a maximum of 5 people, capable of allying up 3 parties to total 15. (similar to ffxi) Thus, encouraging 5 people to be the 'max' you would want in your SP parties.


Edited, Feb 2nd 2011 2:52am by BadJoRed
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#16 Feb 02 2011 at 5:29 AM Rating: Default
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Quote:
I wish Ancient Magic did awesome damage relative to its MP Cost.


Try bumping up your INT?



Edited, Feb 2nd 2011 6:30am by XooZQ
#17 Feb 02 2011 at 5:42 AM Rating: Excellent
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BadJoRed wrote:


Granted: however there will be a gate outside ishgard so you can not enter. Wish granted again! But the chocobos will only run as fast as Hermes' shoes.


I wish they would make parties a maximum of 5 people, capable of allying up 3 parties to total 15. (similar to ffxi) Thus, encouraging 5 people to be the 'max' you would want in your SP parties.


Edited, Feb 2nd 2011 2:52am by BadJoRed


Granted! However, your party/alliance is made up of classes that only throw rocks making every fight near impossible.

I wish summoner was back!
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#18 Feb 02 2011 at 5:45 AM Rating: Decent
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BadJoRed wrote:


I wish they would make parties a maximum of 5 people, capable of allying up 3 parties to total 15. (similar to ffxi) Thus, encouraging 5 people to be the 'max' you would want in your SP parties.



Granted! However most monsters worth getting SP from are adjusted to be tougher than your poor little group of 5 can handle, and NMs require at least 18!

EDIT: Beaten D:

Granted! But perpetuation costs are back in full force, and it's going to be a good 5 years before they notice it's poorly balanced again. Also, it'll be given such an obscure name that people won't realise it can summon until someone finally decides to rank it up to 50, 3 years down the line.

I wish they'd give me a recipe book already

Edited, Feb 2nd 2011 6:47am by Dlaqev

Edited, Feb 2nd 2011 6:49am by Dlaqev
#19 Feb 02 2011 at 6:03 AM Rating: Good
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Dlaqev wrote:


I wish they'd give me a recipe book already

Edited, Feb 2nd 2011 6:47am by Dlaqev

Edited, Feb 2nd 2011 6:49am by Dlaqev


Granted, but you can't open it.

I wish.... I wish I had something to wish for. O_O

Edited, Feb 2nd 2011 7:03am by ThePacster
#20 Feb 02 2011 at 6:07 AM Rating: Good
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Granted, you have all recipes but, must use the modal tiny windows to page through all recipes in the game to find the one you need.

I wish they'd implement the XI chat system........
#21 Feb 02 2011 at 6:44 AM Rating: Good
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NoNametsu wrote:
Granted, you have all recipes but, must use the modal tiny windows to page through all recipes in the game to find the one you need.

I wish they'd implement the XI chat system........



Granted : Your chat log is now full of RMT tells and shouts

I wish I had sushi
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#22 Feb 02 2011 at 6:55 AM Rating: Good
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Granted. The effects are ACC +1, HP -10%. It lasts for 5 minutes.

I wish we could trade more than 4 items at a time.......
#23 Feb 02 2011 at 7:10 AM Rating: Good
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NoNametsu wrote:
I wish we could trade more than 4 items at a time.......

Granted, you can now trade FIVE items at a time, limit 1 (one) trade per billing cycle.

I wish the foods listed their effects in their descriptions
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#24 Feb 02 2011 at 7:19 AM Rating: Decent
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flavvor wrote:
Granted: Wear a clown costume while you play.
I wish the wards wouldn't crash



lol, clown costume
#25 Feb 02 2011 at 7:21 AM Rating: Decent
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Leane wrote:
NoNametsu wrote:
I wish we could trade more than 4 items at a time.......

Granted, you can now trade FIVE items at a time, limit 1 (one) trade per billing cycle.

I wish the foods listed their effects in their descriptions


Granted, now you can see it after you buy them.
i wish how to use items on macros
#26 Feb 02 2011 at 7:27 AM Rating: Good
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Granted but.. ststs are so low no one will buy food anymore.

I wish the terain didn't look the same outside the starting cities.

Edited, Feb 2nd 2011 8:29am by flavvor
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#27 Feb 02 2011 at 8:12 AM Rating: Good
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flavvor wrote:
Granted but.. ststs are so low no one will buy food anymore.

I wish the terain didn't look the same outside the starting cities.

Edited, Feb 2nd 2011 8:29am by flavvor


Granted, but they remove all beastmen so all you can kill is poorly imaginative local fauna. Huh, wait..

I wish there was an auto-attack
#28 Feb 02 2011 at 8:43 AM Rating: Excellent
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northernsky wrote:
I wish there was an auto-attack


Granted, but each auto attack costs 500 TP and 1/2 your stamina.

I wish monsters dropped gear.
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Mikhalia: only 5% or less of my posts are utter crap.
Tyapex: 393 posts of utter crap...
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#29 Feb 02 2011 at 8:47 AM Rating: Good
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Mikhalia the Picky wrote:
northernsky wrote:
I wish there was an auto-attack


Granted, but each auto attack costs 500 TP and 1/2 your stamina.

I wish monsters dropped gear.


Granted, but it's part of a leve and you have to turn it in to NPC.

I wish story-line quests were not so ridiculously easy
#30 Feb 02 2011 at 8:56 AM Rating: Good
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northernsky wrote:
Mikhalia the Picky wrote:
northernsky wrote:
I wish there was an auto-attack


Granted, but each auto attack costs 500 TP and 1/2 your stamina.

I wish monsters dropped gear.


Granted, but it's part of a leve and you have to turn it in to NPC.

I wish story-line quests were not so ridiculously easy


Granted : Parley is now part of every storyline quest and the npc level is set to 1 million.

I wish parley had never been invented!
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#31 Feb 02 2011 at 9:14 AM Rating: Good
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Granted: Story battles now consist of 45 minute dialogue sequences with random yes/no questions that have no bearing on the direction of the discussion or story. The challenge is staying awake during the boring cutscene.

I wish they'd unlock airships already.
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#32 Feb 02 2011 at 9:17 AM Rating: Good
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Khaap wrote:
northernsky wrote:
Mikhalia the Picky wrote:
northernsky wrote:
I wish there was an auto-attack


Granted, but each auto attack costs 500 TP and 1/2 your stamina.

I wish monsters dropped gear.


Granted, but it's part of a leve and you have to turn it in to NPC.

I wish story-line quests were not so ridiculously easy


Granted : Parley is now part of every storyline quest and the npc level is set to 1 million.

I wish parley had never been invented!


Granted! Parley is replaced with 8 games you must beat on the 8th day of the 8th week on the 8th month of year 8888.

Edit: Was beaten.

Granted! Airships are unlocked at rank 75.
I wish we could bet on chocobo races again!

Edited, Feb 2nd 2011 10:19am by MrStyles
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#33 Feb 02 2011 at 9:21 AM Rating: Decent
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Granted: But all airships take off fly for 30min and return to where they started.

I wish we had a Golden Saucer.

>.< i wish i wasnt too late to make a post

Edited, Feb 2nd 2011 10:22am by widnes
#34 Feb 02 2011 at 9:39 AM Rating: Excellent
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widnes wrote:
Granted: But all airships take off fly for 30min and return to where they started.

I wish we had a Golden Saucer.

>.< i wish i wasnt too late to make a post

Edited, Feb 2nd 2011 10:22am by widnes


Granted, but there is only one of each of the games, and if someone else is using them, you'll have to wait and hope to claim it when it is not in use.

Granted, but your Zam account has been banned.

I wish I could run FFXIV on my NES.
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#35 Feb 02 2011 at 12:35 PM Rating: Good
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Mikhalia the Picky wrote:


I wish I could run FFXIV on my NES.


granted but you can only play culinarian, and only make sand

I wish that I could garden
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#36 Feb 02 2011 at 1:03 PM Rating: Good
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Olorinus the Vile wrote:
I wish that I could garden


Granted, but you can only garden in your mog house, which is not yet implemented.

I wish they would implement mog houses.
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Mikhalia: and FWIW, my posts are 95% helpful, informative, or funny.
Mikhalia: only 5% or less of my posts are utter crap.
Tyapex: 393 posts of utter crap...
Mikhalia: Sounds about right.
#37 Feb 02 2011 at 1:20 PM Rating: Decent
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Mikhalia the Picky wrote:
Olorinus the Vile wrote:
I wish that I could garden


Granted, but you can only garden in your mog house, which is not yet implemented.

I wish they would implement mog houses.


Granted! but it's only the size of a Monopoly box.

I wish I could ALT+TAB out of fullscreen without crashing
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#38 Feb 02 2011 at 1:27 PM Rating: Excellent
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Dranio wrote:
I wish I could ALT+TAB out of fullscreen without crashing


Granted, but you lose anima and gil over time while the screen's focus is lost.

I wish FFXIV will advertise when the game is fixed.
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Mikhalia: and FWIW, my posts are 95% helpful, informative, or funny.
Mikhalia: only 5% or less of my posts are utter crap.
Tyapex: 393 posts of utter crap...
Mikhalia: Sounds about right.
#39 Feb 02 2011 at 1:30 PM Rating: Good
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Mikhalia the Picky wrote:

I wish FFXIV will advertise when the game is fixed.

Granted, but /shout will forever be spammed with crude toilet humor and epeen wars. :P

I wish we had more challenging content.
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#40 Feb 02 2011 at 2:47 PM Rating: Decent
Granted, but it is impossible to complete without the item the content gives you, creating a paradox that destroys the world.

I wish I was playing FFXIV right now instead of waiting on the patch.
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#41 Feb 02 2011 at 3:43 PM Rating: Good
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Granted, but the Uldah doors have bugged again and lock you in place for the rest of the day.


I wish Gil meant something in this game.
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#42 Feb 02 2011 at 3:50 PM Rating: Good
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Jamaz wrote:
Granted, but the Uldah doors have bugged again and lock you in place for the rest of the day.


I wish Gil meant something in this game.


Granted, but you have every item so why bother.

I wish linkshells had more functions!
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#43 Feb 02 2011 at 4:02 PM Rating: Good
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MrStyles wrote:

I wish linkshells had more functions!


Granted but they are restricted to three members!

I wish we could raise chocobos and go digging with them
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lolgaxe wrote:
When it comes to sitting around not doing anything for long periods of time, only being active for short windows, and marginal changes and sidegrades I'd say FFXI players were the perfect choice for politicians.


#44 Feb 02 2011 at 4:12 PM Rating: Decent
Granted, but all they dig up is Gyshal Greens.

I wish Cornyboob would make a thread that didn't result in a string of sub-default posts. (Just read his new one...*sighs*)

Edited, Feb 2nd 2011 5:13pm by StateAlchemist2

Edited, Feb 2nd 2011 6:07pm by StateAlchemist2
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#45 Feb 02 2011 at 8:02 PM Rating: Decent
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Grand Master Alchemist StateAlchemist2 wrote:
Granted, but all they dig up is Gyshal Greens.

I wish Cornyboob would make a thread that didn't result in a string of sub-default posts. (Just read his new one...*sighs*)


Granted! but anyone who looks at the thread is instantly banned from the internet for life.

I wish the chat log had a solid background rather then being clear.

Edit: spelling

Edited, Feb 2nd 2011 7:03pm by Dranio
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#46 Feb 02 2011 at 9:26 PM Rating: Good
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Dranio wrote:
I wish the chat log had a solid background rather then being clear.

Edit: spelling

Edited, Feb 2nd 2011 7:03pm by Dranio

Granted, but due to a programing error, the text is behind the background.

I wish the "/display head off" command would hide the hood of my cowl too
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#47 Feb 02 2011 at 9:28 PM Rating: Good
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Dranio wrote:
Granted! but anyone who looks at the thread is instantly banned from the internet for life.

I wish the chat log had a solid background rather then being clear.


Granted, but the color is opaque and matches the color of the text.

I wish retainers could dance.
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Mikhalia: and FWIW, my posts are 95% helpful, informative, or funny.
Mikhalia: only 5% or less of my posts are utter crap.
Tyapex: 393 posts of utter crap...
Mikhalia: Sounds about right.
#48 Feb 02 2011 at 9:45 PM Rating: Excellent
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Mikhalia the Picky wrote:
Dranio wrote:
Granted! but anyone who looks at the thread is instantly banned from the internet for life.

I wish the chat log had a solid background rather then being clear.


Granted, but the color is opaque and matches the color of the text.

I wish retainers could dance.



Granted, but only the Macarena and the background music in the Wards is changed to the Macarena song.

I wish the strongest armours weren't all metal and ugly.
#49 Feb 02 2011 at 11:56 PM Rating: Decent
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Magnesium02 wrote:
I wish the strongest armours weren't all metal and ugly.


Granted! All of the strongest armors will be made out of styrofoam cups, toilet paper and designed by Versace.

I wish I could map the arrow keys to control the camera like FFXI
#50 Feb 03 2011 at 1:49 AM Rating: Good
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granted, but now the arrow keys will not navigate you through the menus.

I wish the headgear toggle was a 1-hotkey feature, and when you use it you DON'T get the stats as if you were wearing head gear.
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#51 Feb 03 2011 at 8:29 AM Rating: Decent
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BadJoRed wrote:
granted, but now the arrow keys will not navigate you through the menus.

I wish the headgear toggle was a 1-hotkey feature, and when you use it you DON'T get the stats as if you were wearing head gear.


Granted! but due to a programming error it also negates the stats on all of your armor.

I wish the PS3 version would release already.
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