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(My) Kids playing FFXIV, or is 9 too young?Follow

#52 Aug 23 2013 at 4:32 AM Rating: Excellent
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Killua125 wrote:
What? I didn't even know you were on Ultros (a.k.a. the 4chan /b/ server).


actually ultros is the 4chan /vg/ server(i checked) so it shouldn't be THAT bad, heck it shouldn't be a problem at all.

Ontopic: i have a 10 year old cousin who loves videogames, my uncle and aunt don't really know about videogames in general so they asked me to take care of him in that aspect and i think letting kids play games is a good idea but as everyone said, only if you are there watching, i wouldn't let him play CoD in a Pug server, thats for sure.

Edited, Aug 23rd 2013 6:34am by MitArgento
#53 Aug 23 2013 at 5:03 AM Rating: Good
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You are her parent so its finial decision. I'd say too young. It may even be against the TOS.
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#54 Aug 23 2013 at 5:39 AM Rating: Excellent
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Killua125 wrote:
What? I didn't even know you were on Ultros (a.k.a. the 4chan /b/ server).


Dude, really? --> http://ffxiv.zam.com/forum.html?forum=152&mid=1375461320180085109

Come on... I've given you the benefit of the doubt more so than others in many threads, but this is just so far out of line. There are sooo many topics pertaining to Ultros, and Bartel has many of those posts that I'd think it is safe to say most anyone with more than 10 posts realizes he is not only on this server, but instrumental in the ZAM community; given he started the frickin' linkshell. Please stop feigning ignorance on the subject because it is not only silly, but disrespectful.

As for the topic, only you can say how to raise your children. Getting others opinions on the topic is nice to gauge the community's feeling on it, but ultimately it is your kid and your parenting.
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#55 Aug 23 2013 at 5:53 AM Rating: Good
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I'm actually insanely jealous that someone out there gets to share their interests with their kid, and is helping to shape their development. Makes me want to be a dad, and kinda sad that I don't have a kid of my own right now.
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#56 Aug 23 2013 at 8:10 AM Rating: Good
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darexius2010 wrote:

This is all coming from someone who can't really tell you when the last time I was 9. What do you younger folk and new parents think? How is 9 years old for XIV?


Not too young for the game itself (skill at the game can be obtained), but way too young for the uncensored online community component.
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#57 Aug 23 2013 at 8:13 AM Rating: Good
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I think aslong as your in the room and make sure the chat log stays on battle let the kid play. Rather a kid play ffxivarr than CoD or the like. lol Just make sure that they no if anything is wrong to come get you (abusive tells and such) I also know some parents who let there kids farm for them or do quests just not instances.
#58 Aug 23 2013 at 8:13 AM Rating: Excellent
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garethrogue wrote:
I'm actually insanely jealous that someone out there gets to share their interests with their kid, and is helping to shape their development. Makes me want to be a dad, and kinda sad that I don't have a kid of my own right now.


My toddler is constantly telling me to fish everytime she sees water. Which is wierd because I cast a line four times in the beta while she was around. They get really cool to share interests with when they turn 4. Before that they like to break stuff.

Edited, Aug 23rd 2013 9:13am by Valkayree
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#59 Aug 23 2013 at 8:16 AM Rating: Good
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It's not the TV's fault children curse, it isn't video game's faults they're violent, and it isn't music's fault they're sad. It's the parent's.
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#60 Aug 23 2013 at 8:25 AM Rating: Good
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lolgaxe wrote:
It's not the TV's fault children curse, it isn't video game's faults they're violent, and it isn't music's fault they're sad. It's the parent's.


You can parent your hind end off and you still can't keep them from seeing or hearing what they are not supposed to. I quit worrying about language in music and tv long ago, but Jesus with the violence. I can't watch CNN, weather channel, or even prime time TV and not see some dude with a bloody face, or something about some messed up thing that happened. Even toddler cartoon channels are not immune. Worst instance: If I'm not precisely on the button switching off Nick Jr. at 8pm, they start showing naked people (Nick Mom). I'm an 80s kid. The worst we had really was Mortal Kombat and that came out in our early teens. Before that, I lived in the land of beep boop pixelation and my mom thought Ghosts and Goblins was devil worship. Oh how the times have changed...
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#61 Aug 23 2013 at 8:29 AM Rating: Good
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That's when you sit your kid down and discuss what they see instead of shaking your fist at the moving pictures.
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#62 Aug 23 2013 at 8:35 AM Rating: Good
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lolgaxe wrote:
That's when you sit your kid down and discuss what they see instead of shaking your fist at the moving pictures.


My four year old contradicts herself mid-sentence. Rational sanity hit my older daughter at 7, so I know at least there is some light at the end of the tunnel. It takes a team of jugglers and bright shiny things to convince her that you are correct. You can't tell her the facts straight up, you have to sugar coat it and make her feel that it was her own idea. Still, to her, Mickey Mouse and Ranbow Dash are both wiser than her old man. She takes them face value, but no one else.

Edited, Aug 23rd 2013 9:37am by Valkayree
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#63 Aug 23 2013 at 12:14 PM Rating: Decent
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ASpaceman wrote:
9 year olds should be running around and playing with other kids...you know, being socially active outside instead of playing video games in front of a computer or tv.
I don't have kids of my own, and it is your kid so you can raise him/her however you want. Just stating my humble opinion.

Why not both? I was playing games since I was like 4 or 5, but it didn't stop me from "running around and playing with other kids".

As for the OP, I think it's fine as long as someone is with her, though it's really hard to say because every child is different, some 9 years old are more mature than 15yo, sometimes they act like 5.
#64 Aug 23 2013 at 2:42 PM Rating: Decent
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My daughter is almost nine, and there is no way I'd allow her to seriously play an MMO. People are intolerant, she would get upset, and - most important - she should not be rotting her brain with this stuff. She should be interacting with real humans and playing outside and reading books. We should all be aware of how addictive these games are, and I would be horrified at the thought of my impressionable little girl getting sucked into an MMO or any game!

Having said that, I have allowed her to tinker around on my WoW account. She mostly just drowns or sends nonsense messages to people she doesn't know. She's never played for more than an hour at a time and I don't think I'd be happy with her playing for any longer than that.

So for me; in extreme moderation, I would be okay with it. Seriously playing, though - no chance.
#65 Aug 23 2013 at 3:14 PM Rating: Good
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It's up to the parent... there's some language and terms to explain to the average 9 year old, some they might be able to explain to you.

As far as MMOs being addictive, you can use that as an incentive for chores/grades... where each result equals a certain amount of weekly play time. We've had plenty of young'uns in various MMO groups I've played in, some couldn't handle the fast paced responsibilities of group play but did just fine in trios of patient guild/LS-mates or just enjoyed crafting or gathering and solo stuff.

I started playing MMO's (though the massive wasn't as massive as it is now) somewhere around 10 years old and I'm fairly normal now in my mid 30's ^.~
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#66 Aug 23 2013 at 3:26 PM Rating: Good
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It's entirely up to the parents and no one else. The world itself is a dangerous place, the longer you try to shelter your children, the more out of place they will feel when they realize what you have been hiding from them.
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#67 Aug 23 2013 at 3:43 PM Rating: Decent
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Dorgon wrote:
Minimize the chat window and set her off to farm for crafting mats... farm I say FARM!


LMAO Smiley: laugh
#68Killua125, Posted: Aug 23 2013 at 3:45 PM, Rating: Sub-Default, (Expand Post) Good point. Let's just give our 9 year olds weed and alcohol too. They're going to encounter it eventually anyway
#69 Aug 23 2013 at 3:54 PM Rating: Good
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Louiscool wrote:
Some of the text from NPCs is a bit too mature.

For instance... one NPC told me about how he heated his Rivets. If he didn't use the ash of fire elementals, they would get as cold as a dead (insert naughty word for 'woman of the night')'s crotch.

This and more, only in FFXIV!


The Gladiator's quest has a phrase that says something along the lines of "they are about as useless as nipples on a gladiator's breastplate"

Edited, Aug 23rd 2013 5:54pm by LordMethos
#70 Aug 23 2013 at 3:58 PM Rating: Good
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Killua125 wrote:
supermegazeke wrote:
It's entirely up to the parents and no one else. The world itself is a dangerous place, the longer you try to shelter your children, the more out of place they will feel when they realize what you have been hiding from them.


Good point. Let's just give our 9 year olds weed and alcohol too. They're going to encounter it eventually anyway


Let me be perfectly clear in saying that a video game is not weed and alcohol. That is an extreme that no one is debating.

Edited, Aug 23rd 2013 9:46pm by supermegazeke
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#71 Aug 23 2013 at 4:41 PM Rating: Good
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Don't you hate when people who don't have kids try to tell the people who do, how to raise them? They have no freaking clue!
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#72 Aug 23 2013 at 5:24 PM Rating: Good
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AngusX wrote:
Don't you hate when people who don't have kids try to tell the people who do, how to raise them? They have no freaking clue!


All day I have struggled with urge to say that in this thread. It's surprising how many people will defend their right to have an opinion on issues in which they have no practical experience.

I've learned it's better to just nod and smile.
#73 Aug 23 2013 at 6:26 PM Rating: Decent
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Plenty of people who do have kids and have no idea what they're talking about, too.
#74 Aug 23 2013 at 8:04 PM Rating: Excellent
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Non-educational? I know more obscure names for armor and medieval clothing than a member of the SCA, thanks to FFXI.

A friend of mine was doing her master's degree in medieval history and told me that her thesis was regarding the evolution of houppelandes from the 13th to 14th century. Then went, "I belt no one even knows what that is." I did know, however, that it was a tunic of some sort, and I told her as much. How did I know? FFXI level 70 mage gear: Errant Houppelande.

From subligar to pauldrons, from weskits to gaiters, MMOs will teach you the names of all the armored bits you could ever be curious about.

Also, mythology. Mythology everywhere. The summons are the most famous, but XI has taken a turn into Hindu gods and demons in recent years, which is why you can clobber a six armed Uptala on any given evening there.

That's not to say I disagree that children should be reading books and playing outside. But for rainy days or sick days, or during family time, there's nothing wrong with a video game.
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#75 Aug 23 2013 at 8:38 PM Rating: Good
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i was born 1985, i started gaming at age 5-6 playing Zelda on my mom friends nes playing the legend of Zelda. around 7-9 we got the snes and play mortal Kombat, Golden eye 007, mickey adventures the lion king alladin adventure goof troup video game.

Kinda sad to see al.ot of comments on a 9 year old as if their 4-5 years old. But personally... I wouldn't let a 9 year old on an MMO, you can't really hide the chat box as communication plays a big roll. Its better if they play offline games.

Also from reading OP post, it more seems they want their kid to play for a selfish reason as to wanting to play ffxiv more (i mean no offence that just the vibe i'm getting). Kids don't nor should be doing everything you are. I played Little big planet 2 and saw too much bs from kids. I also had an inncident in my LS on ffxi with a 7 year old and his parent. If you kid wants to game with you pick a non mmo to play that way you don't have to censor stuff. Cuz remember, mmo are played as a community.
#76 Aug 23 2013 at 8:42 PM Rating: Good
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pse text limit......

Your actions/your childs actions will affect others in some way. And if someone is trying to communicate to you are your kid to help with something, anbd the chat log is blocked... kinda defeats the purpose amd may come across as rude.

Now a days i wouldn't put it past ppl to make forum topics just to bad mouth a person fir a slight thing. Cyber bullying is running rampet.
#77 Aug 23 2013 at 9:07 PM Rating: Excellent
Thank you again for all of your replies. As I stated before I'm reading everything carefully as, I'm sure some of you first-time parents will attest to, it's easy to think you are making the right decision when in reality (and this is hard to admit for a lot of people) we really don't have a clue. That all being said, I appreciate everyone's responses and can't state enough how valuable your input has been in a matter that involves a community and activity that I hold very near and dear to me.

First I'd like to respond to the comment made by Darkfae77,
Quote:
Also from reading OP post, it more seems they want their kid to play for a selfish reason as to wanting to play ffxiv more (i mean no offence that just the vibe i'm getting). Kids don't nor should be doing everything you are. I played Little big planet 2 and saw too much bs from kids. I also had an inncident in my LS on ffxi with a 7 year old and his parent. If you kid wants to game with you pick a non mmo to play that way you don't have to censor stuff. Cuz remember, mmo are played as a community.


I appreciate your input here and by no means did I take it offensively. The reason I wanted to put this response first was because of the impact it had on me when I saw it. Initially my reaction was, "Thanks for that...", but as I thought about it those words prompted me to think again on what my motivation for her playing is. As I stated in my OP I was approached by her mother about letting her play. The thought hadn't really crossed my mind until that point. After sitting back and thinking on that for a few moments, her and I share a lot of activities in common with each other that she enjoys. We swim together a lot, we hike, jog, and play various sports together. We also enjoy the same kinds of movies, listening to similar music, etc. Normally these activities are such that she initiates which I'm more than happy to participate in as I enjoy spending time with her. She has watched my play XI and a little bit of XIV and was always interested in the "Lord of the Rings feel" that it has, which is the only thing she has to relate it to.

That being said, when I think of the end motivation for her playing, it's twofold. On one had, yes, I would love to bee-bop around Eorzea with her more or less as my constant companion. I think we could have a lot of fun together. As she grows and develops in-game and in-person and can grasp the mechanics involved in really developing her toon, I think her fluent in end-game activities could be possible in a few years. That'd be excellent. Do I see her farming for me? No. Do I see her playing when I'm not? Definitely not, that will be punishable by lack of icecream for a week (lol). If she decides she doesn't want to play, that's fine by me. That's less bottlenecking that I'll have personally. If she does want to keep playing, that's great, too. It'll be nice to share my interest with a real live human being that I can see in person.


I also can't go on with this post without acknowledging Catwho's response concerning what all she can learn from such a game,
Quote:
From subligar to pauldrons, from weskits to gaiters, MMOs will teach you the names of all the armored bits you could ever be curious about.

Also, mythology. Mythology everywhere. The summons are the most famous, but XI has taken a turn into Hindu gods and demons in recent years, which is why you can clobber a six armed Uptala on any given evening there.


The story you gave as a reference is fantastic. I wish I could say that I didn't go through something similar with the naming conventions during my time in XI, but sadly I have :D This has made for many an interesting collegiate discussion. This is something she can take with her, too, and learn from. I don't know that the context or foundation for the information will be firm at first. She's 9. But it'll stick with her and may inspire her to look into it again some time down the road. That'd be an excellent outcome from playing if even for a day.



In response to the replies concerning chat logs and phrases used in game, I trust her to ask me if she sees anything. Also I'd be sure to switch it over to Battle log if I'm not actively engaged in the game with her (I'll always be there supervising, but I might, say, be cooking at the time). With the scripted references I'm sure she'll ask and I'll happily answer her. She is an inquisitive person by nature, and part of our dynamic is being able to ask and have answered anything that may cross our minds, whether it's what was said in class, to what a certain reference means in a book somewhere she's reading.


That all being said, I think my decision is fairly clear. To start off with, she'll be allowed to make a toon on my account. I don't mind her playing for an hour a day just to try the game out. If she likes it and her grades this quarter are good (and they always are), she'll be allowed to use my old 1.0 account to make a new toon. If her grades ever dip, the game goes away. If she becomes sassy or anything of the sort, the game goes away. If she continues to do well, I don't mind opening up the time frame a little as we go. That'll be to the discretion of myself, though, when we cross that bridge.
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#78 Aug 23 2013 at 10:08 PM Rating: Good
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id say avoid it still, if you read the addition i wrote to my post. Ypu can't simply hide or avoid an mmo community your a part of it 100%. You simply can't just "switch to the battle log" there should be open communication, there will be times player will need to communicate you your child for one reason or another. And it can be off putting to be ignored. Thats why i suggest sticking to offline rpg. I know a few that allow multiplayer local with a "lord of the rings feel" like the lord of the rings game.
Also to better explain what i meant, in my teen years i did a youth employment job at a local daycare. And 2 boys were lil gangsta rap wanna be (their parents let them listen to rap cuz they listen to it) what resulted was these 2 kids ended up being lil hellions, amd at the end of the summer one of them took a fork and tried stabbing me in the back like a prison style shanking. wait till 13 to play mmo together.
#79 Aug 23 2013 at 10:27 PM Rating: Good
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A 9 year old is probably not going to get involved in an endgame raiding guild. Heck, they might not even get as far as the duty finders. Communication is not as critical if you're solo. Hence, I don't think it's an issue to let them play, even if it's just running around and smacking monsters alone and dropping into FATES.
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#80 Aug 23 2013 at 10:45 PM Rating: Good
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there are more to mmo then end game which require some communication, regardless of playing "solo (you never are playoing solo in an MMO) and you would be surpised what kids can do.. i played mortal kombat and zelda at 9 as well as various final fantasy. Gaming isn't hard and its wrong to treat a pre teen like a 5 year old when it comes to skill. I was reading spanish at the age of 3 (i'm not spanish) and i was reading poe by 9. my lil brother on my dad side was playing duke nukem @ 9.

Communication i'm talking about is basic day to day "hi how are you" "Where did u get that gear" or "can you help me with something?" and if ppl get ignored they become anel and can/will say rude things and can/will post it on the forums.
#81 Aug 24 2013 at 1:02 AM Rating: Decent
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Here's what I think, and FYI I'm married 13 years but don't have children. But I do have 6 nephews aging from 4 - 18

If you are going to have your 9 year old play, make sure you are sitting there the WHOLE time. Every minute of it. Too many times parents see computers and televisions as a babysitter while they do whatever. Sitting there and having that time together will not only give you a piece of mind as you can see what is going on, but you can make a game of it as well. Teach them counting, how to read a map, etc

If you are worried about how long to play buy yourself a timer and STICK with it. I have to do that. I can get lost in EQ2 for hours and hours on end. I have a cheap time I can set for 2 hours. It goes off, I stop playing and do work, spend time with the wife, etc. It is also a great way to teach your child perhaps that you CAN work and have fun too!
#82 Aug 24 2013 at 2:54 AM Rating: Decent
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9 is way too young, not just due to exposure to the community but the language of the NPCs, using terms like 'whoresons' and ******* (british for ******** all variations of sexual innuendo, hookers, mentions of crotch rot... Plus, if anyone found out he was younger than 13, you could be banned.
#83 Aug 24 2013 at 6:59 AM Rating: Good
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I started playing UO when i was pretty young. I cant say exactly what age, however i was never supervised at all. I actually improved my reading, typing and spelling skills considerably from the chat in online games and chat rooms. Granted this was long before people typed like they were texting on a highway.

The way i see it, its up to the parents in the long run if they feel their kid is too young or if they should be supervised. But i also figure the internet is like a gun, teach your children the dangers and the rules you put forth and they will understand. And if they get hooked, well now you have something to hold over their head when you need em to take out the trash or clean their rooms.
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